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An Open Letter to Jennifer Lawrence (from a concerned fellow 23-year-old)

An Open Letter to Jennifer Lawrence (from a concerned fellow 23-year-old)

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Dear Jen,

Do you mind if I call you Jen? You’re so candid in all of your interviews that calling you Jennifer feels too formal, but I can’t use the name Jenny without thinking of “Jenny from the Block” (thanks a lot J.Lo). If you want my honest opinion, I think Jenna is probably the moniker that suits you the best, but that’s kind of a niche nickname, so I’m sticking with Jen. I guess it really doesn’t matter, because this letter has nothing to do with your name or what you like to be called, but I was hoping to capture your attention so you would really hear what I’m about to say to you:

It is not normal for a 23-year-old woman to fall down so much.

As a fellow 23-year-old, albeit one who has not won an Oscar or the hearts of countless devoted fans, I speak from my own life experience when I say I don’t trip that often (literally or in an Urban Dictionary context). Last year in early spring, I will admit I took a tumble thanks to a short, unexpected metal pole sticking out of the ground. Prior to that embarrassing gaffe, it’s been many years since I’ve wiped out. I find it a little alarming that you’ve fallen down, publicly, no less, once every year (that we know of) starting with your epic Oscars fall in 2013.

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I could justify falling down that often if you were rollerblading, participating in a three-legged race, or even wading through a pile of dirty laundry and getting your ankle dangerously wrapped in a rogue pants leg, but on both occasions that you’ve fallen, it’s taken place on everyday terrain: a set of stairs and solid, carpeted ground.

Some people are just naturally clumsy, but to fall down at two consecutive Academy Awards? Only a person with a compulsive gambling problem would bet on that happening. The thing about klutzery is that it’s spontaneous. When it comes to embarrassing debacles that could befall you at the Oscars, the odds of falling two years in a row are 125:1–that means you had a greater probability of having an accident in your dress, confusing Pharrell for an African American Eddie Munster on the red carpet, and being overheard asking, “Why is Lady Gaga at the Oscars?” than falling down again, yet you managed to beat the odds.

jenfall

Are you OK? Are you getting enough potassium? Did somebody steal your bones?

Last year the excitement of winning your very first Oscar for Best Actress could have accounted for your shaky knees on those steps up to the stage, but what was your excuse this year? You may have gotten the Golden Globe for Best Supporting Actress, but we all knew this was Lupita’s moment.

Allegedly, when you got out of your limo this year there was an orange cone that tripped you up. I have a serious question: how is a woman who trains like a machine for the Hunger Games movies unable to step around/jump over/shoot arrows at an orange cone that gets in her way? Where’s that Katniss mojo?

Are these falls in your Dior contract? Do Dior’s gowns look best on women who are falling down? I mean, this faux advertisement from your 2013 Oscars fall is pretty incredible:

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As refreshing as it would be to have a talented, A-list actress who literally cannot walk in heels thrown in the mix, I can’t help but wonder if these “falls” have both been staged. I mean, when you’re a legitimately convincing actress, how hard it can be to act embarrassed and humbled after fake tripping? Everyone knows us Americans love watching people fall down, and when they get up and laugh with us about it? Shoot, that’s better than a Big Mac for us. Even more evidence for the phony fall argument: how did this year’s latest tumble on the red carpet fit into Ellen’s opening monologue so seamlessly? She’s good (especially when she tells Liza Minnelli she looks like a man), but she’s not that good.

Let’s look at some other 23-year-old women staying on their feet at the Oscars:

margot 86th Annual Academy Awards - Arrivals Screen Shot 2014-03-03 at 6.00.21 AM

It can be done!

Look, we get it, Jen(na), you’ve dethroned that nasty Anne Hathaway and cemented yourself as America’s new darling with your undeniable talent and timely sound bytes, but you can stop falling down now, girlfriend. You’ve arrived! None of us have any doubts that if you stumble, you could totally laugh it off and joke about it immediately (unlike, say, Anne Hathaway).

You can do this, Jen. Just take it one step at a time.

Best,

Katie

P.S. Next year, instead of Neil Lane jewels, may I suggest a Life Alert pendant.

Katie Hoffman

Katie Hoffman is a writer living in the suburbs of Chicago. She enjoys leftovers, lunges, and laughs.

309 Comments

  1. NotAPunkRocker March 3, 2014

    The Dior ad is perfect!

    I imagine the editor on the Hunger Games movies has their work cut out for them.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      HA! I wonder if there’s a blooper reel on that DVD somewhere with her just tripping in every momentous scene.

  2. bensbitterblog March 3, 2014

    I think if she didn’t do that, we would have nothing else to talk about except Farrell wearing the same ranger hat again.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      I really think Pharrell can do no wrong. Every song he’s featured on becomes a hit. I’m sure his song “Happy” is one of your least favorite on the radio right now.

      1. bensbitterblog March 5, 2014

        You got that right. If he did a song called Bitter, then I would be on board.

  3. The Hook March 3, 2014

    Everyone appears to be looking at Jen suspiciously this morning, Katie.
    Something is truly amiss. Of course, she’ll just use this situation – and the scrutiny, speculation and jokes it brings with it – to garner sympathy. Not that she needs any, mind you. Jen is a wonderful, talented actress – who can’t walk worth a damn.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Agreed–completely. She makes up for it in talent where she’s deficient in staying on her own two feet.

  4. rossmurray1 March 3, 2014

    “Did somebody steal your bones?” You scamp, you!

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Bone thieves are no joke in Hollywood.

    2. Katie March 4, 2014

      WAIT IS THAT REAL? I think I’m most surprised it’s not a James Patterson.

  5. JackieP March 3, 2014

    I’ve always said high heels are bad for a woman’s health. Ha!

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Truth. That’s why I avoid them. Anything more than three inches is too much (a statement that could be taken in so many inappropriate ways).

  6. TK March 3, 2014

    I, for one, feel like I fall way too much. I cannot function well in heels and purposely walking painfully slow on slick surfaces. Maybe some people are just born clumsy, we can’t help it.

    Personally, I blame it one Jen being a bit of a ditz. She always happy and smiling. She seems to care very little if people know she slept in until 10am and had french fries for brunch. Since I enjoy her, I’m going to allow her to be as ditzy as she wants, staged or otherwise. It’s time the slightly awkward and unstable (when walking) but adorably cute people had an actress than can look up to.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Very true. I happen to be a fan of hers too, and I give her so much credit for not only laughing it off, but for almost taking the down the chick in front of her to catch herself–totally something I would do! I think she’s probably one of the most relatable and genuine actresses that’s been famous in recent years.

  7. Samantha March 3, 2014

    Honestly, I’m giving her the benefit of the doubt. Considering how much of a tomboy she supposedly was when she was a kid, I can understand that she’d be tripping in high heels regularly. Considering how many award shows/places with cameras she goes in a year, tripping twice (once a year) at the Oscars isn’t too bad of a record. 😛 Now if she does it again NEXT year, well then maybe we’ll have a problem 😛

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      But I mean, imagine the odds! All those interviews/premieres/press events, and she manages to do it twice at the Oscars? That’s pretty crazy. I think we need to investigate the entire premises of that theater, because something isn’t right.

      1. Samantha March 4, 2014

        Hahaha! Purposeful stumbling blocks, must be the case. 😛 It looked like on this last one like she either caught herself or caught the people in front of/around her in time to not completely fall on the floor, but it is quite interesting… 😛

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Thanks for the reblog!

  8. omawarisan March 3, 2014

    I’ve never seen one of her movies; the only thing i know about her is she falls down annually. Does she act from an iron lung?

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      HA! She could easily be the next Meryl Streep, but she’s just got to get this walking thing down.

  9. Escaping Elegance March 3, 2014

    I agree with Samantha – I’m going to give her the benefit of the doubt and just assume she is bad in heels. I’m a 40 yo woman and I still am a clumsy oaf in heals… although I have never fallen down at the Oscars!

  10. Angela Thomas March 3, 2014

    Well, lets just hope there isn’t anything serious going on with Jen. The likeliness of her falling is due to the high heels and long, awkward to walk in gowns that she probably wears 2-4 times a year! She probably feels more comfortable and more herself in slacks, a tank and rubber shoes she can bounce back from haha!

  11. Rachel March 3, 2014

    Someone last night tweeted “Does Jennifer Lawrence only walk once a year or something” and I burst out laughing. Girl needs some lessons

  12. ddupre315 March 3, 2014

    I sympathize with her. If I’m going to trip and/or fall it will be when everyone is looking and likely when someone has a camera to catch it. Some of us are just marked in this way.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      But I mean, why is her clumsiness seemingly limited to the Oscars? She’s a huge star–if she was falling down other places, it’d be on the cover of OK! Magazine. I’m not criticizing her, but it’s definitely an odd trend.

      1. ddupre315 March 4, 2014

        Likely because of the big dresses she was wearing and the shoes she is not used to wearing. Or…she’s an attention whore..one of those.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Thanks again lady! 😉

  13. Jae March 3, 2014

    This is hilarious! I had a good laugh reading your open letter. :))

  14. trailertrashdeluxe March 3, 2014

    You got FP’d! You deserve it!! Some other statement that rates 3 exclamation marks!!!
    No, seriously, you’re always funny.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Thank you so much! 🙂

  15. Ashley Tejeda March 3, 2014

    There was a part during the oscars where people started laughing at her when she walked on stage. I feel it might have been (no definitely), because she came from the back and walked out the side, meaning there were no stairs involved. But it was more funny that Jennifer was like “Hey! why are you laughing?”, the fact that she is totally cool with the jokes, makes her seem so much more human than the other stars.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      I totally agree. I love J-Law, falls and all, but you have to laugh about these things. I read earlier today that Jared Leto was the one who was laughing because Ellen was doing an impression of her falling or something.

      1. Ashley Tejeda March 4, 2014

        Well that makes sense, I thought everyone was just chuckling at her in general. Ellen was an amazing host, I hope she does it again sometime soon.

  16. Daile March 3, 2014

    Oh Jen, why do you fall down so much? Were you drunk? Was it your terrible hair that made you fall? Are you attempting to be as ‘regular’ and ‘likeable’ as possible? JUST STOP.

    Katie, I hope Jen(na) gets to read this.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Oh gosh, I’m glad we can agree on the hair. I’m not a fan of it. I happen to love J-Law, but the falling is a little crazy to me.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Thanks for the reblog!

  17. Jennifer Anable | Photographer March 3, 2014

    Funny post though I must say, when looking at it from the perspective of a fellow klutz, I can understand how she can train really hard for a movie yet still be able to trip and fall.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Thanks, and I hear ya. But really, what are the odds it happened at the Oscars again, of all places? That’s pretty incredible.

  18. Rebecca Meyer March 3, 2014

    This is hilarious! I love Jennifer Lawrence, probably because she’s as big a klutz as I am. She falls down, and gets back up to claim her Oscar. You go, Jen! 🙂

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Thanks! She’s definitely a boss. If I fell down, I’d probably be too humiliated to even attend the event.

      1. Rebecca Meyer March 4, 2014

        Same here! I’d run back down the stairs, falling again on the way down, and then leave!

  19. Yuna March 3, 2014

    This is hilarious and witty. What a nice post to read in morning (Middle Indonesia Time) :). Nice freshly pressed 😀

      1. Yuna March 4, 2014

        You are welcome 🙂

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Last year when the “staged” allegations started flying around, I thought it was impossible. But after this year? Who knows.

  20. havannamoonoutsourced March 3, 2014

    I don’t know, I think Ms. Lawrence is just good ole fashion “clumsy” she actually tripped over one of her people (on the Red carpet) and of course, she fell down and laughed. Once is enduring twice is suspect and three times is #Clumsy
    However, I still love her work 🙂

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Oh, me too. I think she’s a phenomenal actress, and I love how genuine she is in her interviews. Have you seen the gif of her wiggling her arm “fat” on the red carpet? It’s everything.

  21. Eva March 3, 2014

    I would kill to look that good in her dress. I would still fall on my face but I would look pretty.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Oh gosh, me too. She looks AMAZING in everything. If I was going to fall down on camera, I’d want it to be in Dior.

  22. bensbitterblog March 3, 2014

    Wow, Katie the Lady. That was quick. You’ve been pressed three times now. This one just came out this morning!

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Thanks! I know. I really owe it to Emily at The Waiting blog. She tweeted it to Freshly Pressed, and they actually liked it.

  23. melanielynngriffin March 3, 2014

    I’m not one to cast aspersions. If somebody dressed me up in those clothes and put spike heels on me, I wouldn’t stand a chance (pun intended). And at least *something* entertaining happened at the Oscars!

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Stand a chance–ha! Very true, but I mean, she wears heels and gowns at other events, too. It’s just odd that the Academy Awards have her trippin’.

      I still think she’s wonderful anyway, but I have to poke a little fun.

      1. melanielynngriffin March 4, 2014

        Good point – I’m not at all prone to heels and gowns.If she does it on purpose, it’s a weird persona to cultivate. There are enough Hollywood types drunk & high and falling down. Do we need a “cute” faller-downer?
        Thanks for the laugh!

  24. dlintzenich March 3, 2014

    From another “normal” 23 year old woman? I fall down about as often as she does – that is to say, all the time – and frequently trip over nothing. I’m glad you were graced with excellent balance and a self of self-poise……some of us weren’t. It’s refreshing to see someone who, even though they may act for a living, isn’t acting off-screen.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Thanks for recognizing my excellent balance and poise.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      That was actually inspired by a Dane Cook routine about Burger King called “The BK Lounge.” I highly recommend it if you don’t already hate him like everyone else does.

  25. sonworshiper March 3, 2014

    “I find it a little alarming that you’ve fallen down, publicly, no less, once every year (that we know of) starting with your epic Oscars fall in 2013.”

    That seems a bit overblown and sensationalized.
    “Starting with 2013…” Right, way back in… last year?
    “Once every year” for a streak of… carry the tens… twice?

    Does it seem possibly staged? Sure, I’ll grant that. Should she need to stage falls to win the hearts of fans who think, “Oh, she’s a normal person like me” – No, of course not. If that’s her thinking, if it is staged, I hope she gets a clue and stops.
    But let’s not make this more than it is.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Um, this is a humor blog, not the Washington Post. It’s absolutely overblown and sensationalized. That’s why it’s funny (to a lot of people).

      1. sonworshiper March 4, 2014

        Ah, I see now. Derp.
        On the bright side, this means my overblown response to your letter fits perfectly!

    2. Katie March 4, 2014

      Definitely! We’ll just pretend that was the intention all along.

  26. shamonrf March 3, 2014

    Ha! I like all the thought put into this!

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Thank you! I clearly have nothing better to do than to theorize reasons Jennifer Lawrence trips.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Thanks! And thanks for reblogging! I seriously appreciate it!

  27. betternotbroken March 3, 2014

    Katie, the whole thing is suspicious. Highly suspicious indeed. She can train for a movie role yet not practice wearing heels for a show viewed by millions around the world? Congratulations Lupita! Congratulations to you Katie on your Freshly Pressed streak!

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Thank you! I’m so glad someone understands that this is a huge conspiracy that deserves all of our attention.

  28. Lily March 3, 2014

    I figured I better comment on this now, before I get lost in the Freshly Pressed shuffle. I totally agree with all your words on Jen(na). She kind of bugs me now that everyone loves her and acts like she can do no wrong. To be honest, if I was walking in heels, I would be falling all over the place, but I would be sure to avoid the heels if I knew I was going to ummm THE ACADEMY AWARDS.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Right? I’d totally fall down, too, but why does she never fall at any of her press appearances?! She doesn’t only wear heels and couture to the Oscars! Something’s amiss!

  29. writerbeelove March 3, 2014

    Definitely the shoes. Heels are horrid and I can attest to someone breaking a foot due to stepping wrong on a pair of these uncomfortable, muscle-binding contraptions women are expected to wear to dress up. If I were going to the Oscars, you’d find sketchers under my gown.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Me too. Or flip-flops like it’s Sophomore year of high school at Homecoming. A lot of the women in my office wear heels, and I just can’t do it. Maybe my flats and boots give a less professional appearance, but I don’t care.

      I still think it’s uncanny that she seems to fall exclusively at the Academy Awards and not any of the other interviews/premieres she attends.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Yeah, I thought I mentioned that?

  30. thebipolarmormon March 3, 2014

    But she’s almost as adorable as Jennifer Aniston or Andy Richter, I forgive her.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Oh, I totally forgive her, too. She’s a doll, but I have to poke fun. I’ve never been a Jen Aniston fan, so we’re at odds on that front.

  31. sweetspassion March 3, 2014

    Do you wear five inch stilettos she wears? I’d fall too.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      All I did was joke about how it’s happened twice in a row now at the Academy Awards. It’s not as if that’s the only event she wears stilettos to. I don’t wear the 5-inch stilettos she wears because she’s a movie store and I’m a nobody in Chicago.

  32. Candice Major March 4, 2014

    This is super funny. I don’t think I agree that she staged them though. Stilettos and carpets can be a surprisingly tricky combination.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      You’re probably right, but imagine what a juicy conspiracy that would be!

  33. Mary Grace Albario March 4, 2014

    Oh boy, thanks to this, I didn’t know until now that Jen had fallen often and on a very much celebrated awards night.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      She totally did, and she handled with so much grace just like last time. I’d probably have gotten back into my limo and gone back home to hide under the covers.

  34. Twilla Amin March 4, 2014

    I laughed…incredibly loud starting at “It is not normal for a 23-year old woman to fall down so much” all the way down to “P.S. Next year, instead of Neil Lane jewels, may I suggest a Life Alert pendant.” Hilarious!!

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Thanks! I thought the Life Alert thing was pretty clever myself.

  35. Twilla Amin March 4, 2014

    Reblogged this on Sweet Tea and Sass and commented:
    This heartfelt and open letter to my best movie star friend had me in tears! Please enjoy!

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Thanks for the kind words and the reblog!

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Thanks for the reblog!

  36. Serge Plastikoff March 4, 2014

    There is a formula for what makes falling funny. It’s funny when somebody falls 2 and 1/2 times, then it becomes funny again when somebody trips 33 times in a row. Charlie Chaplin demonstrated that in one of his films where he carries two buckets of water. He trips two times at the same spot, the third time instead of falling again, Chaplin stops at the spot and empties his buckets himself, without tripping, making it the 1/2 “fall.” The tripping becomes funny again when somebody manages to trip 33 times in a row.
    Both Jen and Ellen used this formula. One tripped 2 and 1/2 times while another used the tripping in her speech 33 times :)!
    Loved your open letter!!

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Ha! Great points! And thank you.
      If J.Law had been carrying two buckets of water, I wouldn’t have bat an eye.

      1. Serge Plastikoff March 4, 2014

        hahahaha me too ;)! Which reminds me, maybe I should re-watch him fall several times in Sherlock Holmes again :)!

  37. nunniie March 4, 2014

    LOL This is sooo funny !!! hahahaha but she’s always perfect in her dress. ><

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Thanks! And I know. That peplum was fabulous this year. I love a good peplum dress.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      It seems about as logical an explanation as anything else.

  38. numto March 4, 2014

    yeah… i hope shes just a cluts and not having some other larger issues in life… <3 you jennifer lawrence. http://num.to/8154*4894*7761

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      I wonder if falling down/tripping often is a symptom on WebMD?

  39. Narky March 4, 2014

    Good grief, an entire blogpost about someone for falling over.

    “I find it a little alarming that you’ve fallen down, publicly, no less, once every year (that we know of) starting with your epic Oscars fall in 2013.” Er, you know 2013 was last year, right? So that’s 1 year and a bit, so she’s fallen over twice? I trip up more than that in a week.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Wait, 2013 was just last year? I hope you find your footing.

  40. liampitts March 4, 2014

    This had made my day so much brighter. You wrote exactly what everyone is thinking. Excellent.

  41. waterlilieswanderlust March 4, 2014

    Hahaha this is exactly what was on my mind too! Nobody could possibly be this much of a klutz in an international award show!!

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      It’s just such a huge coincidence that she tripped at the Academy Awards again. I mean, she goes to events and movie premiers all the time. It’s pretty incredible, really.

  42. Ian G March 4, 2014

    You could say she’s just having trouble… finding her feet! *ducks*

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Ha! You could definitely say that.

  43. cheriblevy March 4, 2014

    Wow, I just laughed out loud, at my desk…at work (oopsies), so funny – girl, I am a new fan of yours! Looking forward to adding more funny in my life by following you. Props on making FP.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Welcome! And thank you! Don’t get fired!

  44. 1pointperspective March 4, 2014

    Had I known there would be women in gowns falling down, I might have actually watched the Academy Awards (not really, that’s like watching NASCAR for crashes or “90-Day Fiance” for break-ups/deportations). I’m going to go ahead and predict no fall for Jen next year, but TWO in 2016. You read it here first. Great post – congrats for the big FP.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Ha! We’ll see how it all plays out. I read she’s thinking of taking a year off once she’s finished filming the last installment of Hunger Games.

      Thanks!

      1. 1pointperspective March 4, 2014

        If she takes a year off, the first part of my prediction is looking pretty good. By the following year, she’ll be so crazy for Oscar that she’ll trip twice, and I’ll look like a psychic!

  45. awax1217 March 4, 2014

    I note that many of these people starve themselves to maintain their figure and add that they usually are on ridiculous heels, I am just surprised that they do not walk with a cane.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      True story. Being hungry in heels? Not exactly a recipe for stable walking.

      1. awax1217 March 4, 2014

        Many models do just that. Skinny to the point of extreme.

  46. Thewitch March 4, 2014

    Brilliant!!! Especially the fake ad, love that.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Thanks! I loved that ad when I saw it last year. I wish it had been for a real ad campaign.

  47. emilylewis90 March 4, 2014

    Oh chill out. She fell because shes not used to walking in haute couture gowns and heels. Plenty of a listers fall its just a big deal now because its j-law.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Well, she’s been acting since 2006, so, I’m not entirely sure that’s accurate. But I will totally consider chilling out (mostly because I wasn’t aware that I was upset).

  48. emilylewis90 March 4, 2014

    I doubt shed do it on purpose, purely because everyones reactions now are easy to predict but either way shes getting the attention. Third times a charm

  49. Miss Conceptions March 4, 2014

    it was fixed by the punting mafia and by the trade union of united stuntmen federation. No doubt… But seriously she should enroll in a course “How to walk with heels and look elegant” or should not appear to the oscar award anymore.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Hey, I give her all the credit in the world for keeping her head held high and laughing it off, but two years in a row? What’s up with that?

  50. obzervashunal March 4, 2014

    Phenomenal job! I too love the Dior ad at the end… thought it was for reals… should be….

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Thank you! I totally think that ad could’ve been in a magazine. I thought it was real when I first saw it floating around the Internet.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      J-Law definitely is beautiful. (I Google translated you and was relieved you weren’t cursing at me in Spanish.)

  51. segmation March 4, 2014

    Wonderful and well said! Thanks for making my day!

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Thank you for stopping by and reading it!

  52. dzawacki March 4, 2014

    Wonderful, probably what everyone has been wanting to say. I shared this with my coworkers who are big Jennifer Lawrence fans.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Am I now the most hated person in your office? Some people seem to think I was attacking her, which, no. I think she’s great, but what’s up with the falling?

      1. dzawacki March 4, 2014

        No, we loved it and it sparked a conversation as to our thoughts on why she falls. Alcohol, klutz, heels, and long dresses were tossed around with no actual conclusion made.

  53. zobop republic March 4, 2014

    I’ve been looking for a ‘gif’ of Jennifer Lawrence falling. Thanks! 🙂

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Don’t thank me, thank Buzzfeed. But glad I could help!

  54. Properly Ridiculous March 4, 2014

    While I totally think your concern for her health is amicable, being clumsy is quite the struggle in everyday life for people like her. I’m stereotyping her at this moment. I’m confident that if something went horribly wrong & I became famous – I’d have triple the amount of falls on camera with quite possibly a few dropping of awards (cause I like to imagine if I’m famous – I’m winning awards). I’d hate to think she is falling on purpose – that’d totally destroy my want to be best friends with her.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      See, I think if I became famous I’d still avoid heels, because I know I don’t look cute when I walk in them. Wedges I can handle, but regular heels? No. I’m that wobbly-ankled woman, and I know it. If she was faking the falls, I’d only have more admiration for her acting chops.

      1. Properly Ridiculous March 4, 2014

        No one will ever know – I’d be lying if the “on purpose” thought didn’t briefly enter my mind as well though; I quickly excused it as rubbish. Then, I read your post & thought…”Oh crap – I’m not the only one who thought that – please don’t be true”.

      2. Katie March 4, 2014

        Oh no, you’re not alone. Don’t hate yourself for it. There’s a whole counter-culture of people who suspect she faked her falls, and they’re a lot more tenacious than I am.

  55. loveinpages March 4, 2014

    Lol oh my goodness, I laughed so hard. The part about whether she was getting enough potassium? That’s a winner.

  56. ndieckman March 4, 2014

    Maybe she’s Black Cat from Spider-Man and can’t reveal her secret identity, but she’s honestly cursed.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      That may be my favorite explanation thus far. Also, after seeing her as Mystique, I think J-Law would have been a kick-ass Catwoman AND NOW as I finish typing this I see you were talking about Spider-Man, and I’ve mixed up my superhero movies. Possibly more embarrassing than falling at the Oscars.

  57. Rohini March 4, 2014

    Funny post!
    She might have loose ligaments- I do, and I fall probably more often the Jennifer Lawrence… 🙂

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      Loose…ligaments?! Is that painful? How did you become aware of this?! (I genuinely want to understand this entire phenomenon.)

      1. Rohini March 4, 2014

        It isn’t painful but all your ligaments move more than usual. So you are more prone to twisting and spraining.
        I used to fall a lot. I had a serie of bad ankle sprains, my ortho figured out that my ankle ligaments were too stretched.
        The only issue is you are prone to twisting and sprains, and with every injury, your ligaments get more stretched.

  58. girlychristina March 4, 2014

    LMAO! I love the Dior ad you made with her falling down =D I love Jen, but I do have to question her ability to stay upright. LOL! Great post!!

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      I love that ad, too. Thanks for stopping by! 🙂

      1. girlychristina March 4, 2014

        Np! I love your writing and your blog! I am now a follower =)

  59. mrsalicia March 4, 2014

    I’m not an award winning actress, but I am known for my complete lack of grace. I fall down/run into walls/trip over something at least once a day. Weirdly, this never happens when I wear heels.

    1. Katie March 4, 2014

      You’re a rare breed! I’m usually pretty steady-footed until I put on heels, then all bets are off. What I usually do is bump into things with my elbows/legs causing unsightly bruises. …Which may be worse than falling down.

  60. crazycarefreelife March 4, 2014

    I am a bit disappointed in this post, to be honest. I admire Jennifer Lawerance a lot. Her and I are very similar in one way, we are honest to a fault. We say how we feel and we can’t keep secrets. She is a wonderful acress, but that being said, do you really think she could stage , not one, but TWO falls and never happen to accidentally mention that they were staged? No. She doesn’t give two shits if people think she is fat or if they know she doesnt’ work out or if she swears. Why then would you assume that she would fake a fall just to gain our attnetion? She wouldn’t because she doesn’t care.

    1. Katie March 5, 2014

      The suggestion that she faked a fall (or falls) was one part of a HUMOROUS open letter I wrote. She probably wouldn’t stage a fall, just as I doubt someone stole any of her bones. Context is everything, but thank you for helping me understand J-Law’s mindset…

    1. Katie March 5, 2014

      Thanks for the reblog! I appreciate it! 🙂

  61. emshaines March 4, 2014

    This is spot on!! I was just wondering the same thing..at this point I think she’s trying too hard to be cool.

    1. Katie March 5, 2014

      I have no idea what’s going on, but we need to get to the bottom of this.

  62. voiceswriter March 4, 2014

    Reblogged this on Voiceswriter and commented:
    Jennifer is a sweetheart in person, she’ll learn to walk in high-heels, just give her time. =D

  63. myobt March 5, 2014

    I thoroughly enjoyed your post, but it doesn’t seem like you’ve spent much time accidentally stepping on thousands-of-dollars gowns. It’s either hit the dirt or tear the dress (and they’re usually loaners).
    Sincerely,
    A fellow faller

    1. Katie March 6, 2014

      HAHAHAHA! I love it! (More than I loved that movie, I might add.)

  64. Bonnie March 5, 2014

    Love this letter to Jen! – Thought this was a tad bit odd that she has now fallen over twice, not too sure if it is to make fun of herself or a publicity stunt?

    1. Katie March 6, 2014

      Thanks! And I have no idea. How many people fall down at the Oscars two years in a row? It’s uncanny.

  65. Desire March 5, 2014

    Whaaaaaaahahaha you are a clever teddy!

  66. Abby Boid March 5, 2014

    I have no idea who this woman is. Nevertheless this post grabbed my attention and made me laugh my head off. Love it.

    1. Katie March 6, 2014

      Really??? Wow! I’m glad you enjoyed it anyway!

  67. sirhcortsac March 5, 2014

    Reblogged this on “Anything Under the Sun”

    1. Katie March 6, 2014

      Thanks for the reblog!

      1. emmyanna March 7, 2014

        Your welcome, keep writing it’s a happiness to read your texts! Follow me! X

  68. lauranwilson1 March 5, 2014

    I know plenty of girls our age that trip on thin air, for no reason at all. I find it endearing- Jen isn’t perfect. That’s what makes me like her more. So I say trip all you want Jen! Just be careful, don’t hurt yourself! 🙂

    1. Katie March 7, 2014

      I have to be honest–I don’t know (m)any people that trip that often. I had no idea how sheltered my life was. But yes! She handles the tripping like a pro, so good for her.

  69. You'll Soon Be Flying March 5, 2014

    The bigger question is if these seemingly genuine falls are in fact phony, how will we ever believe anything any actor ever does or says again? Oh my! Funny stuff.

  70. Maggie O'C March 5, 2014

    I think I’d have to see what it’s like to walk in those insane heels, with a long gown on, up stairs, with people right on me, etc. to know how often I would fall. I think you’d be surprised at how fast writers can add things to teleprompters.

    Jen’s problem is she got too popular, now comes the inevitable backlash.

    Congrats on the FP.

    1. Katie March 7, 2014

      I wasn’t trying to be backlashy, it’s just a funny coincidence. I mean, she wears couture and high heels at other events besides the Oscars.

  71. Charlotte M March 5, 2014

    Amazing!! I am a huge JL fan, and this made me giggle. 🙂

  72. HomeEcGirl March 5, 2014

    Great post! I really like J Law (why does Hollywood have to do dumb things to names?) as an actress, but falling a second time…

    1. Katie March 7, 2014

      Jennifer Lawrence is a moderately long name, so I’ll give Hollywood that. (Then again, I’m not sure how I’d feel about becoming K-Hoff.) (Actually, I kind of like it.) But yes! Exactly. I think she’s a cool chick and a great actress, but two falls? It’s madness!

  73. shallowmommyproblems March 5, 2014

    too funny! as someone that can barely talk while walking, I feel her pain! perhaps she is wearing one too many pairs of spanx and isn’t getting enough oxygen to the brain

    1. Katie March 7, 2014

      Total possibility! But I mean, we’ve all seen her as Mystique so we know girlfriend doesn’t technically need any Spanx.

  74. zareenn3 March 6, 2014

    You SHOULD actually send it to her.
    This is the first thing that I have read of you. You can judge how much I liked it from the fact that halfway through I stopped and clicked the follow button without reading anything further.

    1. Katie March 7, 2014

      I have no idea how to get it to her since she’s not on Twitter. Maybe someone in her entourage is a fan of my blog. (I promise I’m not that delusional.)
      I’m glad you stopped by and followed!

    1. Katie March 7, 2014

      Thanks for the reblog!

  75. meowlife March 6, 2014

    I AM DYYYYYING reading this! Made my morning!!
    Although I have to add that as a naturally clumsy girl (I trip on my heels at least once a day, fall into a corner or wall a few times a week and at least once a month end up on flat on my face or ass, I do not know why) her falls are way too dramatic, and I usually try to avoid using people as props to pull myself back to stability…

    1. Katie March 7, 2014

      Thank you so much! I’m glad! 🙂

      I mean, if I was going to fall down, I think I’d want to take as many people out with me as I possibly can, so I give Jen credit for trying to grab onto that chick in the black dress walking in front of her.

    1. Katie March 7, 2014

      What?! How come? I think she seems pretty down-to-earth, but there’s no judgment here. I’m glad you liked it!

    1. Katie March 7, 2014

      Thank you for the reblog!

    1. Katie March 12, 2014

      Thanks for the reblog!

    1. Katie March 7, 2014

      I WAS GOING TO TWEET THIS EARLIER! I feel vindicated. Mr. Perfect Hair gets me.

      1. She's a Maineiac March 7, 2014

        haha! Yeah, he has better hair than I do. Something’s wrong there….

      2. Katie March 7, 2014

        I think he’s a more attractive woman in drag than I am just biologically.

    1. Katie March 12, 2014

      Thanks for reblogging!

    1. Katie March 12, 2014

      Totally possible, but what is it about the Oscars that always trips her up?

  76. thewayniac March 8, 2014

    Hilarious. I still watch America’s Home Videos to see people fall daily and now I will tune in to any award show you girl, Jen or Jenna or Jennifer is on! Excellent writing. I’m a total sports guy, but I can definitely read your humor. Looking forward to more.

  77. Zen A. March 8, 2014

    Ha, this was brilliant! When she fell down the first time, I thought, okay, maybe she was just too excited about her win. But the second one looked a bit fake to me. =/

    Congrats on the FP! Well deserved. =D

  78. krysteendamon March 8, 2014

    I don’t know. My sister (also a Jennifer) just turned 23 and that girl falls over everything. EVERYTHING. She always has a new bruise or a limp going on. It’s quite entertaining to me. Especially since my 3 year seems to have inherited that from her aunt (kid doesn’t watch where she’s going and runs into walls all the time). I’m also pretty sure I’ve seen other photos of Jennifer Lawrence falling outside of the Oscars. Could be wrong.

  79. zeroBelief March 8, 2014

    I think she’s channeling Gerald R. Ford, former V.P. of the USA…..hell, Saturday Night Live made their NAME off of Chevy Chase doing NOTHING but spoofing Ford for tripping and falling everywhere he went around the world, and inevitably, on tape or photo…..

    Besides, if JEN falls, I can catch up to her easier 🙂

    http://www.zerobelief.com

  80. kevingharris March 9, 2014

    She could be Black Cat in the next Spider-Man movies and I’d be okay with that.

    Sorry I nerded out there a bit. Seriously though, as a straight male, I always pay attention when I see her. Crush to the max. But it should be discerning when I also take notice at how often this girl falls all over the place. She is indeed – straight trippin’.

  81. harpermckinley March 9, 2014

    I think Jennifer handled the fall with grace and style. She got right back up and picked herself up.

  82. Heather March 10, 2014

    Hahah a similar post can be written about my own clumsiness

  83. Monica DiNatale March 10, 2014

    Funny. Jennifer seems real and secure with herself. Anyone can take a spill!

    1. Katie March 12, 2014

      She definitely does, and you’re right! …But two in a row?! Come on! That’s pretty unique.

  84. 4thgradenothing March 11, 2014

    As someone who started falling, daily, at an early age, I think you should add a post script to this letter. Something like:
    Jen(na),
    If you aren’t faking, and this is the life your destined for, please know that by the age of 34, it will take a toll on your body. You can only fall down so many sets of stairs, invisible cracks in the ground, etc… Before you roll an ankle, damage an ACL, or break a wrist. I suggest practice with crutches and a backup work out plan for when cardio means staying off your feet. The struggle is real, my friend.

    -a chronic faller

  85. vmcc5 March 11, 2014

    This was the best read!

    1. Katie March 12, 2014

      Thanks for the reblog!

  86. Amanda March 11, 2014

    Heels don’t come naturally to everyone, especially someone as tomboyish as her. She probably doesn’t wear dresses like that often, or heels ever. Give the poor girl a break.

    1. Katie March 12, 2014

      Oh jeez Louise, it was a humorous open letter. No one’s picking on her. She wears heels at most interviews and press events anyway–it’s uncanny that she’s fallen at two Academy Awards shows in a row.

  87. cricketmuse March 12, 2014

    JLawdedah is so adorable. The tripping is real. Katniss MoJo is the act. Remind me not to stand next to her when she’s in cone zone.

    1. Katie March 12, 2014

      Thanks for the reblog!

  88. seeker_of_fun March 12, 2014

    Pretty funny!! I love your take on this subject!! I also love how you decide what nickname she should have!

  89. catchingsparkles March 13, 2014

    I wish I had not clicked on this because even though I know she would just laugh this off i think she is awesome the clumbsy way she is

  90. brandixoxo March 15, 2014

    Ha loved it! Dear Jen, simply looking out for your safety, enough is enough 🙂

  91. damedessa March 18, 2014

    This is hilarious!!! Sadly, I’m a 27-year-old who falls over way more than J.Law. I adore her and her clumsiness. Thanks for writing 🙂

  92. Harris Lieberman March 26, 2014

    I used to fall down a lot when I was twenty-three. Way too much. In way too many places. Some of them dangerous, if not in violation of local loitering ordinances, and sometimes it took me at least a substantial “nap” before I got up again.
    Forty years (and three absolutely toasted discs, arthritis in both my back and hips, and a ninety-pound Boxer/Mastif mix who thinks he’s as graceful as a kitten) later, I still fall down every now and then. Usually I can crawl to my bed or recliner, or my wife can help me to my feet, or the dog can give me some stability if I can trick him into standing still.
    Then I can usually make it to the medicine cabinet by myself, thanks for your concern.
    But I have learned there are certain things, even certain movements I should not try in public (humiliation) or even in the privacy of my own home (too young and embarrassed to get a “Life Alert”). And I quit drinking thirty-six years ago.
    And so, my precious Jen, lay off the heels, okay? The long gowns are gorgeous on a natural beauty such as you, and they are appropriate for the occasion… but how about some low-cut hiking boots, okay?
    Sally Field does it, and she’s got two Oscars to her name without a single crash landing.

    And Katie, this piece was priceless.
    Looking forward to more.

  93. angeliquedelamere March 28, 2014

    This was a very intersting, humerous take on the whole tripping situation 😛
    I’m a fan 🙂

  94. Chloe Blades March 28, 2014

    Absolutely hilarious. Made me laugh out loud! It’s so nice to read something so light and filled with humour I think I might even read it again!

  95. jgiambrone May 22, 2014

    She probably wears a lot of silly shoes that she’s not used to because someone just sent them over.

  96. Lubaina Ehsan June 14, 2014

    Hahahaha. This is best. The Christian Dior photo though :’)

  97. roger92705 November 24, 2014

    Yes it was one of those day’s, and then all people could talk about was “she was “tripping ” man…..ha ha ha. she took it gracefully like a lady……gaga, boy im on a roll

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